Alone? That’s OK
Google search the word “alone” and you’re returned approx. 5174810 pages. Of pictures in sepia or black and white, of all sorts of things: Sad faced puppies. Children. People. Skulls. Kittens. In puddles. On the edge of a pier. In the rain. With tatty teddy bears. Sad prose. Broken roses.. If one wasn’t depressed when they 1st Googled the damn word they would fast get there!
Wandering along a deserted (it was 5am) beach this morning, I was hit by the realisation that I was thoroughly enjoying being alone. This of course got me to thinking and I started to dissect the word alone.
ALONE. Say it with me: ALONE. Say it out loud: ALONE. It just sounds so negative.
Sure, there are times when the word isn’t all bad. For example: “She couldn’t have done it alone” but even THAT is effectively saying if you ARE alone you’re weak, incapable, incomplete.. Alone, poor you.
To be fair, I tend to go on about alone. Banging on about how I wish I was one half of some sort of decent relationship. If we did a tally up, probably every second entry on my blog says this So today’s realisation that I was alone, (happily) came as a bit of a shock.
Sometimes I do wonder if people who say “I’m OK alone” are just saying it in the hopes they will one day BE ok but I suppose that is what made today’s realisation so much more of a shock. I did mean it. I felt completely okay with it.
So, as I’ve gone through my Sunday. Alone. I’ve pondered this notion of alone and OK.
I walked the beach. Alone. It was peaceful, soothing and enjoyable. I came home and ate brunch. Alone. Cooked. Alone. By me. Alone. In my home. Alone. It was delicious. Alone. Hmm, I didn’t wash the dishes. I need a house keeper, not a mate?
I went visiting some friends. Alone. They didn’t seem too put out by me being alone. And after an enjoyable visit, I drove home. Alone. Stopping at the shops to buy some champagne. To drink.
A little while ago I was on the couch, watching telly. Feet up. Button of my jeans undone (very Al Bundy-esque) bare foot, singlet top. Urban sprawl personified. Alone, of course.
And I actually grinned to myself as I realised how much I was so totally okay with this being alone thing.
It felt good, that realisation.
Not to say that in a few months (or whatever) I wont think “I don’t wanna be alone” but being happily something when you kind of can’t change it: quite liberating I must say.
Now if you will excuse me, I am off to play music. Loud music. And fold laundry. And do dishes. And maybe go for a walk to the park so I can feed some stale bread to the ducks. And then come home and have a long hot shower, wash my hair and drink some champagne..
You guessed it: ALONE
Posted on September 30, 2012, in Change, Happy-ness, Hope, Humour, Life, Love, Optimism, Rants, Relationships, Stress and tagged Alone, Blogging, Dating, Friends, Happy, Hope, Humor, Life, Love, Musings, Random, Rants, Relationships, Romance. Bookmark the permalink. 23 Comments.