A plea, to the code cutters of WP

Just because you CAN, does not mean you should.. I’m tired of $#@! trying to find things because one of you has decided we need to have multiple tabs to view our stats and stuff. I liked the table format for reading blogs under assorted topics. I’m fed up with not being able to easily read the comments I’ve made on other blogs. But at the same time, WTF were you thinking with the emailed comments check box bizzo?

I read and comment on a lot of very busy blogs. My inbox is having conniptions thanks to the new spam check box you’ve developed! Have you people not heard of the unsolicited email laws? Ok it probably doesn’t count since this is the WWW and a blog but OMG please change it back, that functionality chaps my ass.

*stomps off in a huff* 

Blogs .. And a challenge

I started blogging almost a year ago and have found some fab blogs in that time. Many of you will know that in the blogosphere there is any number of awards going around but today this is just MY show and tell of the blogs that I follow / enjoy for no reason other than that I’d like to share them.

OK I lie .. In return for my sharing these gems with you, I challenge you to read one (or more!) and post a comment about your fave. Ready? GO for it!

Good morning Vietn.. uh, Korea

Living life – without the need to grow up!

Creativity flows through her veins

Seriously humourous or is that humourously serious? 

A Place For Pleasurable Procrastination

Living well is the best revenge

Satyricon – be sure to check out the madness

This, that, and most definitely the other

Author of the Gods of Asphalt – I’m part way thru it

I don’t know how to describe her except as awesome!

Poetry in motion

Dating again for the first time in 13 years

Musings of a former hula hoop champion

The random musings of a still evolving soul

What’s in the news today? 

All the insanity of searching for a soul mate

Once upon a Time, in rural North Texas, there lived an Idiot. 

Very normal. Or not ..  You decide.

Stupid ugly and foreign – so he says!

Him AND the voices in his head

This goose is cooked!

This site has a lot to do with your imagination

Sharing her thoughts on life

A woman telling the truth

Simple observations, analysis, and common sense comments

Life, seen from where she sits

Drier. Hilariouser. More Sardonic than before

Odd people are everywhere

Ramblings from an apathetic adult baby

Hide your daughters – is all we can both say!

Wild geese that fly

Ripping out his guts for your entertainment

I hope you enjoy these blogs as much as I do. And to everyone above, thank you for being  a part of my world. I appreciate each and every one of you!

Censorshit hits the fan

It took me a minute to work out what the heck had happened to Freshly censored Pressed tonight but I got there in the end .. awesome!

I’ll get off my sopa box now ..

Fanning the flames

The other day I questioned whether old flames can be reignited or whether they really should just be left where they belong: in the past..

Yesterday’s epic (and godawful) hangover was a result of my going out on a “remember back when we were young and did this every weekend” sessh with a group of friends I once was very close to, when we all lived and worked overseas.

They’re visiting for the Summer and we’ve picked up where we left off, for the most part.. It’s quite neat.

One of these friends was my – I suppose you would call him “boyfriend”, back then. Eventually, life took us in different directions and we went our separate ways without any rancour or angst..  We’ve kept in vague contact but nothing much more than the odd email to the group etc.

But there is no denying that spark is still there .. It was obvious to all – even this chowderhead when it comes to matters of the heart - when we got together for a drink last Thursday.

Jump forward to today: I STILL feel like death warmed up. My head is pounding and I can’t stop leaning to the left, most disconcerting – not the least cos I was raised conservative. Ok, it hurts to laugh. Hush..

I realise I left you hanging with my “wtf happened?” entry yesterday and now feel very mean cos .. well .. let me tell you what happened..

NOTHING!

Well no, that’s not entirely true ..

First and very importantly: I found my other shoe.

It was in the foyer of my apartment building.. Some kind neighbour had found it and put it on display by our mailboxes.. I’m a little anxious about the video cameras in the foyer because yeah well some stuff went on in that foyer that perhaps ought not have. But remember: no one ever accused me of being overly bright..

I got one HELL of a fright when I did drag my sorry arse back out of bed, mid afternoon – because “HE” (no, NOT that HE!) was in my kitchen cooking up some eggs and toast..

Dressed only in his boxer shorts..

Yeah. I know.. My life is .. weird. And just so you don’t think he’s a complete weirdo – he was in his boxers because he had stayed the night not because he goes out dressed like that! LOL

Anyway, we sat and ate (Ok, I dry wretched my way thru’ a slice of toast) and tried to piece the evening together. The photos! I really hate the fact that everywhere one goes there’s some wanker with a fancy phone that takes good quality pics.

Bring back the grainy old ones where you could easily deny being the person in the pic, it was so hard to make out..

Without boring you with too much detail of the night (Code for: I can’t friggen remember to type it here) It turns out we’d ditched the group around 3am and come back to my place. Just HE and I..

There’d been some stuff take place in the foyer whilst I fumbled to clear my mailbox. Hence the shoe. We won’t ponder too long on quite why I felt the need to check my mail at 3am when I had a man with me.. perhaps refer earlier “not too bright” comment and leave it there.

We then came up to my apartment and proceeded to drink tequila shots.

I want to talk about tequila shots for a moment.

Why is it whenever someone has a hangover from tequila they sound shocked? I just gulped down a bunch of neat liquor, with the only thing watering it down a bit of salt and some friggen lime. Duh. Tequila is never a good thing to drink. Ever. And if you do – you deal with the fall out. Whingers be damned..

Says me who died yesterday and is still whinging about it

Fast forward, without going into too many gory details.. we actually got very dull during the tequila phase .. we sat talking. Reminiscing.. About the things we’d got up to back when we were together. It was quite lovely.. then came the tequila lay-backs. My belly button is still sticky after several showers.. I swear that stuff is nasty.

Eventually there was a little more kissing and stuff, but prudence won the day and he went off to sleep in the guest room and I went to sleep in my room. Or rather, passed out naked star-fished and snoring (I’m willing to bet) on the bed.

I am so hawt..

We spent yesterday evening together, went to the movies and had dinner. Or attempted to .. he drove me home, we parted and well, he’s due back here in an hour to take me out to brunch

What’s going on, I hear you ask?
Buggered if I know ..

But it’s nice ..

The morning after ..

Feeling a tiny bit delicate – I stumbled out of bed and headed to the kitchen in pursuit of drugs, cold water, coffee and if the gods were in a benevolent mood: I’d have taken death, also. It was a fun night out, or at least – a booze filled night, judging by the state of my aching head. Heck, even my eyeballs ache.

Cold water and drugs duly downed (coffee proved too difficult) I decided to head back to bed.

Almost tripped over this in the hallway:

Stand there (ok fine, lean there) looking down at my dress wondering.. I have a closet, for all I tend to hurl things into it and slam the doors shut before it all leaps out to attack me.. but for the life of me, I do not remember how my dress came to be on the floor in the hallway!

My body reminds me that I desecrated it severely on my big night out with my old flame and some friends, and that I really do need to go lay down – so I step over the dress, and make my way to the head.

Sitting on the er, throne (listing to the left ever so slightly) my eyes focus a bit more. And I note with some level of bemusement that my bra is in the bath. IN THE BATHTUB, really. By now my brain hurts as much as my eye balls.. trying to work out what happened..

But it’s still too much, bed calls..

Making my way down the hallway I stop in the doorway of my guest room. Indeed, at least I know I had my underwear on when I came home .. small mercies..

I make it safely back to my bedroom, collapse onto the bed and drift off to sleep, wondering ..

WTF happened last night?

And where in the hell is my other shoe!?

PS I’ll give $1m to the first person who brings me coffee, fried food (or at least a cheese burger, fries and some ice cold coke) Oh and and more drugs..

Can old flames be rekindled?

or did they die out for a reason?

Last night I was out with a group of friends who are visiting from Europe. I’ve not seen them in almost a decade but it was more distance that kept us (literally) apart, than anything else..

As is often the case in a small town – word got out of our gathering and at one point there was over a dozen of us sitting drinking & reminiscing, but eventually it dwindled down to the core group of us from the ‘old’ days and the memories came flooding back..

One of the guys was someone I had a fling with.. well, I guess you’d call it a fling. We spent the Summer together.. And since we all lived in the same villa, it meant we were virtually together the entire time. If we weren’t working, we’d be planning (or recovering from) some sort of fun activity, we did so love to party..

They were halcyon days, in far simpler times. God I sound like I’m 102 not 42 lol.. anyway .. they were good times and I have many fond memories of those days.

He’s since moved to London and is some hot shot banker – over here to visit family for the Summer.

Life has taken us both in fairly different directions but last night saw us reconnect in a very obvious way (NOT that way, you pervs!) I was pretty sure it was happening, but wasn’t entirely sure if it wasn’t more the sunshine, the booze.. or just my imagination.

It wasn’t until I was in the bathroom with a gal-pal (as we do!) who nudged me and pointed out that she could see the sparks flying too, that I realised it wasn’t my imagination.

I do wonder though..

A) What’s the point, he’s going to be here for just a few more weeks.

B) We didn’t work out originally. There was a reason.. although for the life of me I can’t really recall it .. But why go there a 2nd time when it didn’t work first time round?

But hey, no one ever accused me of being sensible, we’re all going out again on a bit of a drinks, dinner and dancing binge tonight – I shall keep you posted on how it pans out..

I’m getting the hang of this on-line dating thing!

I mentioned awhile ago that I’d signed up to a couple of dating sites and it’s fair to say that initially I found some aspects of the whole online thing a little off-putting, people seem a bit more invasive,  more aggressive with the safety net of a screen in front of them. However, I decided to put my misgivings aside and just get into the spirit of things, after all – if I want this to work I have to invest something too, right?

So, this morning I was sent notification that someone (2 someones, actually) had emailed me.. Very exciting indeed!

I duly logged in and set to having a read. After all, a few nice chats would ease the pain of being back at work today, I figured .. I’ve copied and pasted them below so you can enjoy them as much as I did. Bear in mind, each new line is a new message. The site I was on is not the nicest I’ve ever used ..

***

Hardbod4U: Wud u b put off by 11 inches babe?

Farce*: LOL, uh, depends where, I’m thinking <– trying to be nice, aren’t I good?

Hardbod4U: I’m in LA babe

Farce: Oh well then no, 11 inches wouldn’t faze me in the slightest! <– totally didn’t get it, did he?

Hardbod4U: Wud u like 2 swap pics babe?

Farce: All my pictures are on my profile, feel free to have a look if you’d like.. <– remember HE messaged me so he had to have seen ‘em already!!! $#@!

Hardbod4U: Fuck lady, ur gna get nowhere on this site wit ur attitude.

Farce: Er, really? What makes you say that?

Hardbod4U: Ur stuck up I wish u were here though ur hot

Farce: Thanks. Would you like to buy a vowel?

Hardbod4U: haha fk ur a bitch

Farce: (I know, I shouldn’t have, but oh come ON) And this week the letter “O” is on special, I can give you 3 for a dollar.

No reply for some reason … 

***

***

Benchpresser69: Hey

Farce: Hey there Benchpresser! Thanks for the msg – so, is that 69kg or 69lb you bench press?

BP69: Huh?

Farce: Just stares at the screen .. (And considers logging out)

***

(I’m no quitter)

***

GRainger: Hi. SWM/41. Do you have any baggage?

Farce: Baggage?

GRainger: Yeah Baggage.

Farce: I do have some very nice gucci suitcases, but I don’t know that I would loan them to a total stranger..

GRainger: hahah you’re funny <– liking the fact he uses apostrophes for all I didn’t understand his 1st msg lol 

Farce: Thanks, I am told I do have a good sense of humour. So, I have to ask – Why the baggage question?

GRainger: I hate chicks with kids. 

Farce: Oh fair enough, I hate kids too. They totally ruin your figure, and they never leave home – of this I am assured

GRainger: How many you got? I got 5. 

Farce:(fffffuuuuuuuuu) er, I have to run now – urgent meeting to attend. Take care .. <– he DID email me again, omg

***

Undeterred (for reasons that elude me!) I decided I’d take the bull by the horns and send a few messages myself! Apparently women never do this, so I thought this was something I’d have a hack at! I searched online profiles and found one that had a name I liked ..

Now I admit, I didn’t put too much in it, after all – if they don’t reply it is a bit of a waste of time and effort. Instead I kept it short and to the point. But topical, I thought!

***

Farce: Hey there, I like your handle. I choose life too!

IChooseLife: What do you mean?

***

Ok, fine NOW I quit.

*Not my online dating name but you all know me as this, so it’s easier.

Red Flags & Dating

I think I mentioned awhile ago that I’d manned up (so to speak!) and joined a couple of dating web-sites. Well somewhat unusually one of them allows users to critique your profile.. Under the guise of “experienced members giving feedback to help your profile do better”..

My arse that’s what it’s for .. It’s just a different place to prospect.. !

But let me back up..

So I placed my profile in this “review me” forum when I 1st signed up because.. well, the website suggested it. And although it sounds a bit naff, I’m all about learning and let’s face it, I (clearly!) have no idea what appeals to men, so I figured why not seek some feedback..

First guy posts within minutes of me shutting the site down. It was very exciting, I got an email saying “X has given feedback on your profile”. I ran back to my laptop and logged in quickly to find that he has posted this:

“You look cute but there’s a few red flags in your profile. Good luck.”

He neglected to mention what they were, that would be far too friggen helpful of course!

So since I’m on the site, I scan my profile. Red Flags, wtf?

Maybe it’s the bit where I say “I am kinda torn between wanting to try and have a successful (happy) relationship and thinking that maybe it just can’t be done.” IN my defence I realise that could sound overly cynical on a dating profile but I do qualify that by admitting I believe all this means is that I will be cautious.

So not all bad, right? Meh don’t tell me – I’m over feedback!!

As it turns out I can’t take the profile off this forum .. so it’s still there.. still eliciting feedback. Like it / helpful or not!

I logged back in earlier today to find that a couple of other men have commented – Only to say they think it looks great and they’ve then raced off to send me an email. As have a heap of other guys. It’s kinda cool but somehow kinda weird too .. don’t ask me to explain why it just is..

In the interests of research I decided to check out the other profiles seeking feedback i.e.: those posted in the same forum.

Curiously, Russian seems to be the most commonly occurring language, amid the broken english and ever-so-slightly-slutty / photoshopped photographs. Yes, at this juncture I realise what I’ve done..

There’s a reason people like me shouldn’t be on dating websites. We’re not smart enough to know how they work for a START Oh well.. it wasn’t a total loss I did get to chat to a very sexy Scotsman today AND scored a blog post idea.

Hmm so do you reckon this is where I am going wrong?

I talk to men but get excited when I score blog entries?

Crap..

Playing favourites

Dredging up memories of my german studies at school, many .. many.. aeons ago.. I think the word liebster means something like “dearest” or maybe “favourite” would be more apt. Either way, it’s the name of an online award designed (I think) to recognise up-and-coming bloggers.

Apparently 1 of the rules is that its meant to be offered to bloggers with fewer than 200 followers.. And I suspect this will be in an attempt to encourage newbie writers, because if there is one thing I’ve learned in the last few months of blogging: watching your stats can become alarmingly addictive, if one is that way inclined. And I am.. I believe I’ve said it before – I need to get out more. I know..

Anyway, this week I was nominated for this award by two lovely bloggers that I follow: 
http://mrtinney.com/
 and 
http://klextin.wordpress.com/
 A big thanks to you both, I appreciate the fact that you read and enjoy my blog

In accepting this award, the recipient must agree to:

• Thank the person who gave them the award and link back to their blog – Check!
• Copy and paste the award to their blog – Check!
• Reveal the 5 blogs they have chosen to award and let them know by commenting on their blog - hmm!

Gosh ..

OK this is going to be hard because the blogs I follow are all fabulous and I hate the idea of not linking to them all, grr grr grrrr Yeah yeah I know, I’m a wuss.. Hmm if I apply the followers rule that may eliminate a few cos I know some of the blogs I follow have gazillions of readers .. lemme go look …

(back soon.. chat amongst yourselves k)

Right, I’m back. And this has been very stressful!!

But without further ado, here is my short list of 5 blogs I think you should check out:

1. An amusing writerwho’s blog makes me smile, laugh and / or think!

2. Following this woman’s search for a mate is a great read, very entertaining .. if a little frustrating at times. To be fair, that’s just from being a spectator, spare a thought for her!

3. I am pretty sure this man oops woman  will have more than 200 followers but her blog doesn’t say, so she’s nominated. Check out “shit her kid says“, it’s laugh out loud material. Oh and as to the man comment – when I first read her blog, I thought she was a he. It was a compliment!!

4. Everyone (boys and girls) should follow this blog, he’s very insightful. I just recently found him and am glad that I did..

5. This woman is not just a fabulous writer, she’s smart and an all round good person. Be sure to check Julie out!

This has been really shiddy to do actually, because I’ve left out being able to wax lyrical about Edward Hotspur: one of my fave bloggers on the web, then there’s BrainRants, Three Months to Forty, Be the Change: Leave the Cave!, and my spoon buddy verynormal. Plus the lovely kibble queen *grin* then there is this very sweet man, and Heather Christena Schmidt, The Byronic Man, Trask Avenue, psychodynamom *deep breath* then there’s the adventures of johnsep and the writings of life in the boomer lane and Philosopher Mouse of the Hedge and the beautiful Deidra Alexander’s Blog and Unwrittentruth’s Blog and Robotic Rhetoric, the beautiful KayJay, plus my crazy new pal Chris and and and ..

Ahhhggghh it’s all too hard I’m SO sorry if I’ve omitted anyone, but basically if I follow you it’s cos I think you’re all great and I love reading what you write and hate hate hated having to pick just 5..

Happy New Year to everyone in my blogging world

Happy New Year!

And  so it begins. As I type this it’s 5.51pm, 31 Dec 2011. My lists await me.. In order to ensure constraint free thinking, my apartment is spotlessly tidy. My bed turned down and ready for me whenever it is I feel like going there..

And it’s time to drink some bubbles!

Yeah cos that makes for fun list making *grins* Happy New Years, whenever you get to 2012 and however you celebrate it: I hope the months ahead are filled with everything you need.

And more. Fuckit, let’s be greedy on such an occasion!

The one where she was thankful.. And happy

I’m of the view that people who do neat stuff should be told as much. Be it the admin girl I have working for me who is ah-mazingly good or be it the chick who didn’t wish me Merry Christmas when both of us clearly had hangovers and wished we were anywhere but at that shop so early on Xmas eve morning.

At least all I had to do was buy OJ. She was there for 8 hours. With xmas carols playing.. I ESP’d her soothing thoughts.. no words were spoken but we bonded in that moment of “$#@!! Christmas” solidarity before I went home to drown myself in a large glass of freshly squeezed orange juice.

But I digress..

This post is in part, bought about by the fact that New Year’s eve is upon us. Now I have to admit, New Years is a tradition I’ve never much gone for. I figure why start the new year exhausted, with a hangover, broke and possibly even having to chew your arm off because your beer goggles fell off in the night!?

I can do that routine ANY given night

Instead, New years eve I tend to spend smugly alone contemplating the successes I’ve experienced in the last 12 months of my life.. Which generally means I have plenty of time to watch a movie and still get to bed early *grumble* All jesting aside, I use it as a time of introspection, when I ponder over the things done (or not done) in the year that is drawing to a close.

And I take a stab at mapping out my year ahead.. Don’t get me wrong, 5 out of 10 things on the annual list never get done. But I always do it, and enjoy doing so..

This year will be the first in 8 that I will not be sharing it with a man in my world. Or home, as was the case.. And I’m at peace with this, after all – it was my decision to end our relationship this year. But it does mean a change in my planning for 2012. And that’s exciting to consider!

To get the night off to a good start I plan to open some very yummy French champagne, say a toast to ME ..

And prob’ly very promptly wobble off to bed. Champagne goes flat so I will have to drink the entire bottle. I know .. it’ll be terrible

But before I embark on this boozy “ME” evening, I want to send out a big Happy New Years greeting and a thank you..

When I started this blog back in June, never in a million years did I imagine that a) I’d get anyone to read my ramblings and more cool b) I never imagined I’d meet so many lovely people to whom I actually feel quite close.

Is that weird? I know we’ve none of us met, yet some of you I do regard as friends. You’ve helped me to think clearly, you’ve given me hope. You’ve laughed with me (maybe AT, now and then too!) and generally been a very real support network through what has been a big year for me.

And I like that.

Oh before I go – below you will see something that made me smile when I saw it yesterday!

I was on the brink of 200 followers and yes I rushed to take a picture, it gave me a thrill – I lead a sad life *grin* If you are one of the people who made me smile when I took this pic yesterday – thank you.

Here’s to a fabulous 2012 for us all!

Must .. not .. share .. feelings ..

Talking to a young male friend the other day – he was excited after a coffee date with a girl he rather fancied. It was cute..However he was lamenting to me the fact that he didn’t know how it had gone.. Now bear in mind he’s young and stupid (everyone under the age of 40 fits this category when you’re my age, deal with it) but our chat got me to thinking..

HOW the hell come it’s not the done thing to let people know how we feel any more?

I’ve experienced this exact same dilemma as my young friend. Just last month I was gob-smacked to find myself thinking “should I text and say thanks or will that make me seem too interested?” after having been out on a date with DTR. Remember him? Yeah we never recovered from the Xmas discussion I’m afraid. Ah well.. wasn’t meant to be.

But back to the bit about people not being willing or able to communicate any more. And, worryingly – the fact that I seem to be falling prey to it..

That realisation really pissed me off because til recently I used to just act on instinct.. I’m a firm believer in following your gut however it’s also fair to say that I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve. And you know? I’d generally say that I think this is a nice way to be but yeah, well .. look how bloody well that’s worked for me thus far, huh!

I do know that as a result of the last big break up, I’m trying to be more circumspect because as we all know – showing interest and being open is a dating code word for DESPERATE!

Or at least that is what it seems to mean to so many people now. However, that is a topic for a-whole-nother rant, today I just want to ponder why and when did it become normal to not be able (or willing or allowed!?) to communicate how we feel ..

And worse, when did we start acting like this about someone we obviously liked enough to go out on a bloody date with?

You see, normally with me you 100% know where you stand. I loathe playing games, I find them time consuming and wasteful.. And they often end up just hurting people. And for all I like to think I’m a tough old broad, I dislike hurting people.

I’d rather be up front and honest, even if it hurts initially – than lead someone on or ignore them. Honesty is the best policy when dealing with affairs of the heart, I believe.

I think the thing that annoys me so much about this whole dating “game” is the fact that a) the rules are not given out at the start of the game and b) the rules are subject to change at any moment, usually right about the time you think you may be starting to understand said rules.

Still, I console myself with the fact that beautiful people, young people, rich people, stupid people – even smart people – all seem to struggle with the rules of this game. So it’s not just me that has no idea what I’m doing.

This morning someone posted something on a blog I follow  that made me think we’re all going about this dating thing wrong. I realise when you read his blog you’ll wonder at the leap to where I’m going but work with me k  You see maybe we shouldn’t PLAY hard to get, perhaps instead we should just BE hard to get.

By that I mean sure, we should value ourselves sufficient that we make good decisions. BUT once you’ve made the choice to go out with someone – run with it, enjoy it, be real .. and importantly: Don’t dick the other person around.

This post is a little disconnected and that annoys me but I’m gonna run with it anyway!

What’s the point of a blog?

Someone asked me this yesterday after I’d mentioned the fact I had a blog and went on to say that mine was an anonymous one.. An understandable question I suppose.. although their statement “surely the idea of writing something is to have it read?” did annoy me somewhat.

I tried to explain to them that people do allegedly read my blog, but that they didn’t know who I was, as such. This lead to an even more irritating conversation where I was teased for having make believe friends (wouldn’t be the first time lol) and advised that I needed to get a life.

Which got me to thinking. You see to me this is a diary of sorts. Except for one liddle thing, if anyone had come within 100 feet of my hand-scratched-anguish-filled paper diaries when I was keeping them way back in my tweens, teens and 20′s, I’d have set the dogs on them.

And as you can imagine my diaries back then positively brimmed with excitement. You know: really juicy stuff like at age 16 writing: “I hate my Mother, why won’t she let me date that hot 20yr old boy” and other equally as “private” and important (snort) stuff.

Let’s face it, how exciting can a teenager’s life really be?

Yet I write the most personal of thoughts, the most intimate details about my life here on the interwebs for the world to see, laugh at and even at times, abuse me about.

Which begs the question!

Why do I blog?

I started this one a few months ago as a place to dump thoughts whilst going thru a particularly complex break up. I figured it’d save my friends from groaning every time they saw my number on their caller display units as I battled with a range of emotions and thoughts .. And continue to do so

Over time thought – it’s become a place not just to dump my thoughts but a place I go to read others, also. Some are painful, some are entertaining, others educational. Some offer me inspiration. All are enjoyable and I have to say that I am thankful for discovering the world of WordPress and all you fabulous people who inhabit it and have become a part of my world.

So do you tell people about your blog? And if so, what do they say in response?

They say opposites attract

Well to “they” I say: Twaddle..

I could probably stop right there, because really – that sentence does sum it all up. But I have a predisposition to talk shit (it comes with the boobs) and so I’m gonna add more. And as someone who’s done the opposites ‘attract’ deal, I even feel like I’m moderately qualified to speak on this theme!

Not content to marry (then divorce!) a guy who was so fundamentally wrong for me, some years later I went on to spend 1/3 of a decade with another man to whom I was physically attracted but who was a mental marshmallow .. we honest to god had nothing in common except .. well .. you know..

Amazing how long that type of “relationship” can last when you’re young, dumb and full of .. the joys of life And in all fairness to marshmallow-man, we did have loads of fun cos he was a not just very funny – he was also charming, albeit a total lightweight in the brain-stakes.

When we split I said “never again, I need a man with a brain”, however again to be fair – I can since recall times I’ve been bored to the brink of stabbing myself in the eye with a fork (just for something to do!) with men who are intellectuals because somehow they shut off their sense of humour in the process of becoming big giant brains.

As always it comes down to balance huh.

Interestingly, to me anyway – the whole misconception about opps attracting seems to be so very common. Not helped I am sure, by every romance novel reminding you that Mr tall dark and brooding (and of course: independently wealthy and so handsome he makes your eyes ache) is going to fall madly in love with the meek, left leaning well-bought up virgin he rescued from a fracas in a bar last Tuesday.

*insert dry retching noises here*

An element of difference is acceptable / normal and probably even a good thing but I’m a firm believer that there needs to be a core of alignment – there has to be some fundamental similarities between you in order for any relationship to stand the tests of time.

Right this cynical old biddy is off in pursuit of a cheese burger  (the blogger I’ve linked that to assures me it will cure my slight hangover.. so I’m going to test the theory) Happy daze people!

Spam

I don’t get it.. actually that isn’t true I do get it. Lots of it! There’s a lot about it I don’t get though. What’s the point of spam? And is it computer generated or do people sit and type up the spam comments we all get in our dashboards each and every day?

Below is today’s spam comments.. And in light of the fact that it just seems rude to ignore them, I have sent them all replies. Do you suppose they’ll all then reply to my reply to their reply?? Yikes..

You could certainly see your expertise in the work you write. The world hopes for even more passionate writers like you who are not afraid to say how they believe.

What can I say. I have specialised in fucking up relationships and not being able to keep a man for many a year now. (sigh)

Hey! This is my first comment here so I just wanted to tell you that I enjoy reading your articles. Can you recommend any other blogs/websites/forums that go over the same subjects?

Not wishing to be rude or anything, especially since you’re a comment virgin, but have you tried the search function? Was it good for you?

Would you be fascinated with exchanging links?

I wasn’t til you mentioned it now I feel like I should be. Perhaps if you would give me 21 good reasons why I should be fascinated with exchanging links and we can talk some more? Thanks ever so much.

Greetings from Darwin, Australia. My name is Nicky. I am a nineteen year old business student. I found this post when I was doing some research for my university assignment. Thanks for your work. I now have a lot more direction. 

I’m intrigued. What the heck do you Aussies have in your curriculum that you could learn ANYTHING from my blog? Actually, don’t tell me, I’m cynical and stressed out enough as it is.

My brother recommended I may like this website. He was once totally right. This publish actually made my day. You cannot imagine simply how so much time I had spent for this info!

You are right, I cannot. I am, however, mildly concerned that your brother told you to check out my fuck buddy post. PS Are you from Tasmania? 

Thanks a bunch for sharing this with all folks you actually understand what you’re speaking approximately! Bookmarked. Kindly additionally discuss with my site =). We may have a hyperlink exchange contract between us as I feel I love you heartlfeltly.

Thank you for your kind words however in the interests of being a better person .. I am pretty sure that a friend of mine .. a lovely lady who goes by the name of Heellis would love to hear from you, flick her a comment on her blog! Or better yet, send her some dick pics. She lives for those. 

Its like you read my thoughts! You appear to know a lot approximately this, like you wrote the guide in it or something. I feel that you can do with some percent to drive the message house a bit, however instead of that, that is magnificent blog. A fantastic read. I’ll definitely be back.

Clearly I need to drink more.

Hi from Woollongabba, Australia. My name is Nicky. I am a nineteen year old law student. I Googled this blog when I was doing some research for my college assignment. Thank you for your help. I now have a lot more direction

I have a question: Has anyone ever pointed at you and laughed when you say Hi I’m from WOOLLONGABBA? 

I do not even understand how I ended up right here, however I assumed this post was great. I do not recognise who you might be but definitely you are going to a well-known blogger for those who are not already.

I’m famous in my own mind, my own lunchtime AND yeah well that’s about it really. Well done finding my blog even tho you have no clue how. That took skill. 

Уважаемые читатели.

У многих из Вас есть маленькие дети, которые мечтают побывать на Новогодней Елке!

Когда приближается новый год билеты на елку, разумеется, расходятся быстро. Но ежегодно есть и еще одна общая черта – никто и никогда не знает, что именно будет на кремлёвской ёлке. Малышам преподносят сюрприз, и только они, те, кто смог пройти за стены Кремлевского Дворца, смогут узнать все тайны, смогут рассказать, что за сказка им открылась. Родителям нужно учесть, что продажа билетов на новогодние елкиначинается заранее, и нужно поспешить, чтобы стоимость кремлевской елкиименно для вас оказалась приемлемой, чтобы успеть подобрать нужную вам дату и время.

Закажите билеты на кремлевскую елкупрямо сейчас! Телефон: +7 (495) 545-17-57.

My Russian is a little rusky er rusty, but I think this is an advert for a hot, big titted russian bride. I translated the number for anyone who’s keen.. (And sent her the names of every man who’s viewed my blog .. hur hur) 

And lucky last:

1] IGNORE THIS PLEASE