It’s OK to die old & alone!
Why is everyone soo all fired up about the notion that someone might die alone? In many ways I think it’d be ideal. If nothing else it saves your family / loved ones the trauma of watching you die ..
And trust me, it makes sod all difference to how you feel being there or being told once it’s happened, when someone dies. And I think I am qualified to say this – last year I held my Mother, while she died. This year someone I cared deeply for died in another city and I was told via text.
It felt shit either way.
But back to my ranting topic..
An old aunt of mine who has “stuck by her man” (even tho they hate each other) said to me this morning:
“Well don’t come crying to me when you die old and alone!”.
I just managed to resist the urge to point out she’d have long kicked the bucket before I get to wear the title “old”, instead gritting my teeth and saying “it’ll be ok, I am sure…” dutiful niece that I am..
I then had the pleasure of sitting thru a further tirade on how us “silly girls” (I’m 41 for god’s sake, hardly a gal much as I like to think I aint middle aged or that grown up lol) expect life to be so much more than we really should.
Why shouldn’t we aim high? Why is it OK to accept mediocrity in our lives? Since when did we become so worthless than we should just “put up with it” .. whatever it may be.
I made a reference to her being in a miserable marriage – she is. And admits it, on her more honest days. Divorced young, with kids and no income .. her requirements were simple: survival and provision.
A man presented who wasn’t completely awful, who had money or at the least: an income source. Voila: A match made in heaven. For her, if nothing else.
In exchange for providing for her and her children, he gets nagged at over meals, lives in a clean house and has a bunch of other things he probably doesn’t value that much.
Yet they both choose to stay together, miserably and hey it’s their lives – good luck to them. That does however, mean they are completely unable to comprehend the notion of someone ending a relationship “simply” to seek something better.
As those of us who’ve been brave enough to do exactly that, ending a relationship is anything BUT simple. I didn’t bother going there though. In the same way as I didn’t bother explaining that I didn’t plan to die old and alone but that I might just be ok if that did happen too.
Some things are just too hard to explain..
For now, I will continue my journey of self discovery (which thus far is more questions than answers damnit, lol) as I try to work out what this whole love & happiness thing is about.
Posted on September 19, 2011, in Change, Happy-ness, Hope, Humour, Life, Love, Relationships and tagged Divorce, Family, Hope, Humor, Life, Love, Marriage, Random, Relationships. Bookmark the permalink. 22 Comments.