You people have NO idea how hard it is being single!

WHAT – and I think I genuinely want to try and understand this – gives someone the right to think they can ask someone who’s single “Soo .. (get the tone right k, pity meets patronising is crucial here) what are you going to do about it then, dear?”

Like one might to someone who’s bought the wrong fucking flavoured ice cream for their dinner party ie just pop down to the local store and grab the one I need, thanks.

A girl could go off this time of year, after fielding yet another annual phone call from yet another idiot relative (woman) in my family. In this case we have a woman who’s lived a completely insular life and has NO friggen clue about the world now (she’s in her late 50’s, never worked other than to have a baby and be married since age 20) nor – perhaps more annoying – does she even remotely understand ME.

Cos you know what, people?

I’ve got no fucking idea what I am going to do about it but for all that? I’m not exactly sitting on my fat arse doing nothing.

I support myself in a very nice lifestyle. Sure, I work 60+ hours a week but I LIKE it and I party anytime anyone asks me to, within the work constraint. I am sociable, I am friendly .. I don’t make small children cry when I venture out in public. Unless they annoy me and I am mean to them 😉

The thing is I wonder if people would rock up to a recovering alcoholic who’s gone to their first AA meeting (after realising they’re ripe for change) and go “hey, about the whole drinking thing” .. NO they wouldn’t. In the same way people do not approach overweight people and go “dude, take it easy with the pies k”.

Cos ya know what? (Deja vu lol)


We know we’ve got issues.
We know we need to change.
We know we can do better.


But ya know what? (Jackass)

We aint exactly having a laugh a minute time where we’re at, either be it at AA, Weightwatchers, the gym or immersed in the love life scene. And your inane and misguided comments DO NOT HELP our cause so hows about you fuck the hell off and go back to your sorry little existence and leave me the hell alone.

I did warn it’d be a category 4, yes?

Sorry. Lots of foul language. Lots of anger. Lots of hurt actually cos really .. and I’m struggling not to cry as I type this – I so do not need YOUR shitty views, I can do the soul searching and questioning fine all by myself..

Merry Fucking Christmas.


About lifeinthefarcelane

Giving life the shake down it so richly deserves.

Posted on December 18, 2011, in Humour, Love, Rants and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 30 Comments.

  1. Screw them. There isn’t anything wrong with being single. Christmastime just seems to make us all crazy. You are not alone. I’m single and you know what? After a 8 year marriage and 2 ridiculous excuses for relationships later … Being single ain’t all that bad. 😉

    LOL! Sure does make great material for rant writing though. I definitely enjoyed your profuse usage of the “f” word.

    • I just ended an 8yr relationship, I SO hear you .. being single rocks .. even my happily coupled friends say to me they envy my life .. and I know they don’t but I know they like bits of it .. what annoys me is that my FAMILY are so unsupportive .. so out of touch with me .. it’s quite hurtful.

  2. Love that last bit about buying a vowel!

  3. The fallacy that gets people into seeking happiness for others into trouble is that what makes them happy is what will make everyone happy.

    • i so agree… u took the words out of my mouth. i feel like half the time someone asks, it’s cuz they’re bored, looking for thier next project (fixing me), or clueless… the writer of this post was so right on that, it really doesn’t help to have everyone asking about it & pushing about it in all ways. It really doesn’t. i hate it when people act like it’s a “Fault” to be single… even say things like, “well whose fault is that?” uh… honey, life happens. i’ve sucked it up & am dealing with it… why can’t everyone else do that too?

      that said, a few people get away with saying that. & i do think about guys, but it’s not a fault or problem to be single.

      • I like that – “I’m someone’s project, to be fixed” .. that is so right how people do that. As soon as they’re “fixed” ie with someone, they think they need to get us to join their club!! I wonder if it’s cos they’re bored and it gives them something to do!! *nasty smile*

  4. I’m with Adrianna on this. I’m just picking up the pieces after a failed marriage, and am enjoying being single more than I expected, and being able to do what I want, when I want to. Besides, too many experiences have taught me that having no relationship is infinitely better than having a bad one.

    Sounds like the rest of your life is in a good place, and you’re enjoying it, so fuck the people who feel the need to make others miserable with stupid questions like that. I always feel that ignorant people like that do it because they really aren’t happy in their own life and can’t help but try to spread that shit around. Probably why I ignore people I know like that when they ask stupid questions.

    • You’re not the 1st person to suggest that and I believe you are right .. fuck the naysayers. Their beliefs are so far from mine it isn’t funny .. but they’re not happier than me! Maybe this is what annoys me lol that they clearly THINK they are sorted and pity me for daring not to be grr grrr thank you for the awesome comment 🙂

      • I’m more of the belief that happiness, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. As long as you are happy with your life, to hell with anyone who tries to tell you that you shouldn’t be. The best way of looking at opinions like this, where they think they have their life sorted more than you do because it’s sorted differently from yours, is to remember that opinions are like assholes, everyone’s got one. I’d credit that, because I’m quoting, but I don’t remember where the hell I heard it. The point is, though, that just because they have an opinion, that doesn’t make it better or even worthy of consideration in some cases.

        Really, don’t ever feel you have to justify, defend or explain why your life is set up the way it is if it makes you happy. I hate that it took me a failed marriage that I got into for no better reason I can remember now than “it seemed like a good idea at the time” to figure that out, but I’ve got it firmly in my mind now and I refuse to let go of it. Instead, I share it with those who seem in need. 🙂

      • Yeah in theory I like your comment but in reality when faced with a rabid relative asking questions and an inability to be rude and hang up on the slag, well .. one gets bombarded. And they wonder why I am always “busy” on Xmas day – the whole lot of them would be at me in one hideous mass!! NO amount of wine can mitigate that situation 😉

        Love the “it seemed a good idea at the time” marriage! LOL I must admit, I like that attitude .. it’s one way of ensuring you don’t go to your grave thinking “damn, wish I’d tried X” cos ya probably did try it!

        Thanks for the comments…

  5. I concur !!!!

  6. Ahaha, we know we have issues, Love it!! That is worth a T-shirt my friend.

  7. You are hilarious. Ah, the world is filled with folks who think their politics/religion/lifestyle/parenting/whatever is the right one for everyone. Tell those people you are secretly happily married to a hot, adoring hunk who waits on you hand and foot. But you have to hide him because your mission in life is to write a blog about being single. Then have a tape playing, with a sexy grovelly man’s voice, pleading you to come back to bed.

    • You’re so right, about people thinking they know what is right and it isn’t just my love life that gets the whole “oh dear what are you doing” from the family.

      I remember when I first went overseas for a short term contract that was going to net me more than most people earn in a year and my granny says to me when I get back (4 months later, as agreed) “oh dear, couldn’t you do it? You want to be careful you don’t get a name as one of those who can’t hold down a job”. It was all I could do not to laugh and cry! Sheeeeit.

      I may just resort to lying and saying I have a man yet!! As to the taped man, I DO like the way you think!!! Oh taped not “taped up” .. *grins*

      PS YOU spent the night in my spam folder (was it fun?? Some odd types hang there … grins)

  8. Could be worse. I’m thinking some old counter-culture types might be there, still protesting Vietnam. Hey, each time Then Husband rose higher in his profession and I told my dad, he would say, “Oh. Is that good?” He thought Then Husband couldn’t hold a job.

  9. It’s almost like you’re saying the hardest part of being single is all the ball-and-chained people looking at you pitifully – as though YOU’RE the one to be pitied! Those fools.

    • LOLOL balled and chained .. indeed!

      What vexes me is that people feel obliged to meddle in my affairs. Meh, not people – family! My friends are fine. This reminds me of a song I heard the other day about a woman turning 32 (lucky cow) and her Mamma calling her to see how she is and asking her why she doesn’t have a man of her own.. “all the good ones are gone” is what she reckons ..

      Which begs the question .. are they?!

      Oh god just what I need – something else to friggen worry about!!

  10. Just phenomenal blog. I always enjoy reading your thoughts.

  11. I need a copy of that tee shirt can someone order me one?

    Small, Female V

  12. Oh & btw, I’ve nannied for years. in several house-holds. Most of these are the ‘picture perfect’ families everyone envies. i can tell you, for all but one instance, i (the nanny) pitied the mother. legitimately. I”d rather live single forever than EVER be caught in one of those marriages, or go through a divorce.

    • As someone above already said – I concur!!

      Being lonely in a relationship is one of the worst feelings I’ve experienced. Even these days when people get on my wick and I rage inside at the whole silly “She’s single, poor baby” thing – I’d really rather this state than the other!

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