What I bring to a relationship

A friend asked me today what it is about me that *I* thought men would like. Of course, this bought about the expected response of “I have boobs, duh” but then it dawned on us that for all I maybe had ideas of what I wanted in a man, I didn’t really know what I was offering.

Does this matter? Do I need to know what I bring in order to then bring about a better relationship? We couldn’t answer that last bit but it is something to think about .. however, over a wine or 3, we sat and talked about the attributes / traits that I have which we thought may appeal to a potential mate.

It was kinda weird doing this. But here’s the list we came up with:

Loyalty – I am ferociously loyal to those I care about.
Honesty – You will always know where you stand with me.
Intelligence – Not something that appeals to all men I know, but it’s on offer.
Independent – I think this is one that puts guys off but it’s a big part of how I am.
Sense of humour –
Somewhat wicked, very quick and probably mightily annoying lol
Sexy. I think we were on our 5th wine when we got to this one but I am. I love sex and need / enjoy closeness with my mate.
Hard working – Both in my personal and professional life.

I dislike the phrase easy going because someone who is as passionate as I am, with control freak tendencies cannot be easy going. But I’m .. Calm . steadfast. I loathe dramas.. But if I get mad, watch out! Actually just leave me alone for 5 minutes and I’ll get over myself.

I can cook better than most. Of course, there’s the boobs.
And I have 2!

Oh and I can shoot to kill, change a car tyre and parallel park. 1st time, every time .. I’m grateful for a Dad who was determined his baby was not going to be one of ‘those’ girls.

I guess what we’ve done is listed the things I cannot change, therefore it’s more of a “like it or lump it” list isn’t it lol


Posted on January 23, 2012, in Humour, Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 35 Comments.

  1. Fantastic! It’s your “lump it” list, some have a bucket list but we all need a lump it list. Like it or lump it list, that is. Ha!

  2. If you don’t know what you offer, how can you find a man that will compliment that?

    • Her question was what I offer that men would appreciate … And THAT I have NO clue about. Me, My strengths and traits i know fine πŸ™‚

      • It still goes back to you sweety, what do you have that men would appreciate, well it depends on the man doesn’t it?

        It depends on what type of man you want to stay with, where you are looking, how you are looking, how you act, all sorts of things.

        Do you want a man to touch your heart primarily, or your body? Do the men you tend to attract look at your heart, or your body?

        Are you drawn more to men who are drawn to your body, if so, is that what you want?

  3. A good list, wine or not! I am friends with quite a few men and some women who talk about ladies like you as if you only exist in dreams! You know since you have boobs and all πŸ˜‰ Kidding!

  4. If you know you, think about what would balance you out. Know where you are weak where a man can bring strength, and where you are strong a man will be weak.

    One i call brother put it perfectly in my opinion, he said his woman completed his circle.

    Just to be clear, she is his woman because she chose him, and gave herself as a gift, same as he did for her.

    They belong to each other, because they belong with each other.

    Much of you will change as you grow personally, and it may be that the one that completes your circle is changing too, and you just haven’t met yet.

    Might also be that what your heart wants, your actions don’t support. I don’t know, just something to think about.

  5. Intelligence is something that any man worth anything would absolutely love about you!

  6. Woo hoo! Parallel parking!

  7. Great list and one that you should be proud of! It’s so much better putting a positive list like this together, reminds you of how good you are. Now enjoy those positive attributes and just let life happen, don’t search so hard, he will find you when you both are ready.

    But one story in the book “The Secret” this woman was waiting for her “man”, but realized she was living her life as a single person. She cleared out half her closet to make room for “his” clothes, she slept on one side of the bed, parked her car on one side of the garage, set the table for two etc. etc., in a very short time “he” showed up: because she “ASKED” for him, she “BELIEVED” in him, and she “FELT” him! Worth a try!

    • It was a nice feeling to read the list and go “hey I am OK” πŸ˜‰

      I enjoyed that book too .. interesting idea re living as a single .. I’ve got that nailed lol And if I am honest, the vibe I send to the universe is “having a man in my life again kinda scares me”. THERE Is the statement of the day..

      The longer one stays single the harder the adaptation will be to coupledom too. Right now I live how I like to, with my stuff the way I want it, doing what I want when I want .. changing to fit in the other half of ‘my circle’, would not be easy maybe..

      • It kinda scares me too.

      • Any idea why?

        I’ve gotta think on it some .. quite why it scares me a liddle ..

        But for now I am going out to dinner w 2 pals to my fave Thai place, nom

      • Oh ya.. I rather enjoy NOT having someone around bitching about where I put my shoes, or about whether or not I wash the dishes RIGHT after dinner. I don’t need another dude in my life taking over my DVR and drinking all my beer.

        Still, I have to admit, it’s not just them… In the past I have found myself feeling like I need to run around trying to make him happy & be whatever it is he wants me to be. (stupid, I know). I love my life right now and don’t want it to change for the worst.

      • we are so alike, maybe a lot of women are this way … we want some aspects but fear others and I am sure that gives off a very bad energy to the universe lol ..

  8. Girrrrrl, you the bomb, like tick… tick.

  9. Fun fun post! & I am so glad you included that last paragraph. In reading some of the guy blogs, sometmes I feel like they are just preaching to the girls “Be this way. Be that way.” Whatever happened to being yourself? That’s what it comes down to.. I just want to be my best self and find someone who loves every bit of it.

  10. Just be yourself and wait patiently for him to find you. You’re perfect for him just the way you are.

  11. Love that you can identify these traits in yourself – lots of people can’t. Whether they are flaws or attributes depends entirely on how you use them.
    Make room for him & he will come.

  12. Judging by your twin pie charts, you have A LOT to bring to a relationship! Lol πŸ˜‰ Sorry, but couldn’t help it… πŸ™‚

    But in all seriousness, I looked down your list and thought about my own wife of 21 years, and she has every one of those traits, which I consider to be very positive assets. So you’ve got a lot going for you, and some day soon, a guy worthy of you is going to figure that out.

  13. I totally relate to the part about being easy going, despite the control freak within. I never know how to describe myself because of things like that.

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