So today I learned
that I give too much.. Care too much.. Fall in love too deeply.. Trust too easily. I’m a hopeless romantic (read: I’m pathetic) Yes, people – it seems that I have a slight tendency to don rose coloured specs when it comes to affairs of the heart.
Which kind of annoys me.
By day I’m a fairly successful business woman: Feared by some, loathed by others. Respected. Maybe even a little well-known. But also probably thought of as a calculating, heartless bitch (by some, anyway) ..
Personally, I believe this is because I am rational, logical and calm. Therefore by not displaying “emotions” I am labelled mean & awful. That said, those who take the time to know me end up very loyal and I have long term relationships with many people that I have managed / worked with over my career.
However, the whole hopeless (hapless, maybe?) romantic thing worries me..
I should back up. You see, I’ve spent some time with a very dear friend this weekend. Out of town, having some gal-pal fun .. and between the champagne and food – we talked, as woman do .. tis fair to say she is unable to comprehend my beliefs and attitudes to relationships as am I hers.
Sadly, she’s been cheated on a few times in her (love) life. I never have. Viz she distrusts men and / or expects all her relationships to fail.
Me – I fall hard (and fast, it seems) but am utterly devastated when they fail. Because for all I am not entirely sure I get what love is or how a relationship should be .. I do know that I want to be one half of something fabulous. And even if I end a relationship, I’m hurt and upset because for me – something huge .. that I invested in .. didn’t pan out.
I’m unsure which is worse..
She’s engaged to be married. I’m single having ended an 8yr relationship recently.. I’m keeping my options open and wondering what life holds. She’s engaged and fretting over what life may hold. For all I am pretty sure she hopes it will be fabulous.
All of which takes me back to the ‘hopeless’ statement above .. (It’s not an adjective I like to be associated with!) Can someone love too much or is that just some sort of excuse for .. I don’t know what, actually ..
Cos really .. I think I’d actually be ok being loved too much .. What am I missing here?
Posted on January 29, 2012, in Hope, Humour, Life, Love, Optimism, Rants, Relationships and tagged Blogging, Blogs, Dating, Drinking, Hope, Humor, Life, Lifestyle, Love, Marriage, Music, Optimism, personal, Random, Random Thoughts, Rants, Relationships. Friendship, Thoughts. Bookmark the permalink. 23 Comments.